De eerste twee alinea's trekken je

De eerste twee alinea's trekken je het verhaal in. De toon is zakelijk en toch informatief, zonder belerend te zijn. Prima! Maar daarna lijk je dit niet vast te kunnen houden. Natuurlijk is dit een heel Engels verhaal van een jachtpartij. Het is natuurlijk een dubieuze pastime, maar los daarvan probeer je door de grappige toon, het wonderlijke gezelschap een beetje voor gek te zetten en dat vind ik leuk. Het verband tussen het jagen op dieren en vrouwen is al wat gelegd, maar zou misschien nader uitgewerkt kunnen worden. Ook de standsverschillen zijn onderhuids aanwezig, maar zouden ook wat duidelijk kunnen. Het lijkt erop, dat het voorval in de jaren dertig speelt, met de nadruk op de fancy auto's, de filmster etc. maar het heeft ook iets tijdloos. De verteller is een observer en een romanticus. Dat het een Romeins settlement is geweest zou je kunnen uitbouwen (het Italiaanse van de vrouw bijvoorbeeld), maar de messentrekkerij doet meer aan de Maffia denken dan aan de Romeinen. Iets met de zwijgplicht Omerta.

Resultaten (Engels) 1:

The first two paragraphs pull you in the story. The show is business and yet informative, without being pedantic. Fine! But then you this not fixed. Of course, this is a very English story of a hunting party. It is of course a dubious pastime, but apart from that, try you by the funny show, the wonderful company for a bit crazy and I like that. The relationship between hunting animals and women is all that, but would perhaps be developed further. Also the stands differences are present, but also what would clearly be subcutaneous. It seems, that the incident in the 1930s plays, with emphasis on the fancy cars, the movie star etc. but it also has something timeless. The Narrator is an observer and a romantic. That it has been a Roman settlement you could develop (the Italian women's for example), but the messentrekkerij does more to the mafia thinking than to the Romans. Something with the vow of Omerta.

Resultaten (Engels) 2:

The first two paragraphs you pull in the story. The tone is businesslike and yet informative without being pedantic. Fine! But then truly be able to keep you fix this. Of course this is a very English story of a hunting party. It is of course a dubious pastime, but otherwise try by the comic tone, wonderful company to put a little crazy and I like that. The link between hunting animals and women's all laid, but could perhaps be worked out. The class differences are present under the surface, but also what might be obvious. It seems that the incident plays in the thirties, with the emphasis on fancy cars, the movie star, etc., but it also has something timeless. The narrator is an observer and a romantic. That a Roman settlement was you could build (the Italian woman for example), but the messentrekkerij does more to Mafia thinking of the Romans. Something with the code of silence Omerta.

Resultaten (Engels) 3:

the first two paragraphs draw you into the story. the show's business and informative without being patronizing. fine! but then you can't seem to keep. of course, this is a very english story of a hunt. it is of course a dubious pastime, but that you try the funny show, the wonderful company a little embarrassing and i like that. the relationship between the hunting animals and women have been developed, but might be. the subcutaneous standsverschillen are present, but also what can clearly. it seems that the incident in the 1930s, with the emphasis on the fancy cars, the movie star, etc. but it also has something timeless. the narrator is an observer and a romantic. it's been a roman settlement could develop (the italian of the woman, for example), but the messentrekkerij does more to the mob thinking to the romans. with the silence omerta.